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Sunday was the day that A and I met to have a de-collaring. We were never into high protocol and never had a collaring ceremony or contract to start with, and it was hard to reflect on where our Ds relationship started and the rest began.
On a gloriously sunny but completely frozen day we met in a quiet corner of a public park and found a spot to say a few words expressing how we felt and what we were each walking away from. I put the collar on one last time, unfastened it and passed it to her friend and we each went our separate ways with the kink-friend allies we'd brought with us that day. One final quiet surge of connection and a final goodbye.
As a dominant no-one seems to focus on how simultaneously vulnerable and powerful you can feel in unfastening a collar, and it was startling to feel in the movement of a length of leather how the feeling of responsibility can suddenly leave you.
It was sad, there was a strong feeling of loss and powerful grip-you-by-the-chest emotion thinking about what we'd had, but the main feeling I had walking away was a sense of release. It felt like this was a chapter closed, and I feel able to look forward and know that both of us are capable of building these dynamics with other people. It felt important to make a declaration of what we were leaving behind, and I'm glad the we did it the way we did.
On a gloriously sunny but completely frozen day we met in a quiet corner of a public park and found a spot to say a few words expressing how we felt and what we were each walking away from. I put the collar on one last time, unfastened it and passed it to her friend and we each went our separate ways with the kink-friend allies we'd brought with us that day. One final quiet surge of connection and a final goodbye.
As a dominant no-one seems to focus on how simultaneously vulnerable and powerful you can feel in unfastening a collar, and it was startling to feel in the movement of a length of leather how the feeling of responsibility can suddenly leave you.
It was sad, there was a strong feeling of loss and powerful grip-you-by-the-chest emotion thinking about what we'd had, but the main feeling I had walking away was a sense of release. It felt like this was a chapter closed, and I feel able to look forward and know that both of us are capable of building these dynamics with other people. It felt important to make a declaration of what we were leaving behind, and I'm glad the we did it the way we did.
